SELF OBSERVATIONS

Friends

One of the important requirements for a successful professional is to be self observant. The self observations in relation to the behaviour, thinking process, presentation, communication, feelings, actions, discipline etc. is a very effective tool to develop oneself as a successful professional. No one in this world is perfect and it is not required too. One should review the performance, challenges, right and wrong decisions, relationship, actions etc. Not all were perfect or right but we can change it .

If we observe minutely our natural behaviour and actions, their impact on others and the reactions we get from such behaviour or actions, it will not only be a great learning but the improvement in that would help us a lot. We need to spend some time to observe and review ourselves regularly to become successful.

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BLESSINGS

Friends

Blessings are invaluable. No one can convert them in numbers and time. When a child takes birth he has the blessings of parents then gets the blessings of many many elderly people, Guru, Saints, etc. etc. These blessings supports him during the journey of life. In my view the blessings are the most valuable assets which are though invisible but very effective. So many times we feels escaped from some major incidence and then remember that some blessings helped us. Also for happy and prosperous life these blessings work wonder. All the members of a family never have same fate in life.

Though luck and attitude play major role but the importance of blessings can not be underestimated. Let me share with you a small story:

"An old rich man had 4 sons. Due to his illness he was bit tensed about the distribution of his wealth. He called his sons and said "Before I die, let me distribute the wealth amongst all of you so later on no dispute creates". All the 4 sons were sitting in front of him. The old man said that I would distribute the wealth according to the need so all the four sons live equally happy and prosperous life.

The eldest son was illiterate but doing well in business so he got about 10% share. He was more like contended person and mainly concerned with his immediate family. He never complained of anything nor demanded. Initially he was supported by the parents only.

Second son was not doing well but well educated and hence got 15% in the wealth. His attitude was not very positive and hence despite good education could not succeed in life. He was greedy and always interfered with other family members.

Third son who was very humble, self made and very well settled, got no share in the property. He was always ready to help any one in the family but never interfered in any of the family member's life. He was not darling of the parents. He never took any financial support from the parents and never thought of the share in wealth.

Fourth son was well educated, highly arrogant, negative attitude but most lovely to parents. He got 75% of the share in the property of the old man. This son was groomed in most protective manner and hence developed own circle of friends and relatives who could praise him.

After distributing the wealth old man got cured and started living healthy life again. Eldest son offered to give his share back but the old man denied. Second son started grumbling about such a low share and started troubling the old man. His intentions were to get more from the fourth son. This generated unhealthy relationship between second son, fourth son and the old man. The fourth son was still dissatisfied because he had expected 100% from the old man. He also started grumbling and create tension for the old man to take back the share given to both the other sons. With all the tensions and fights the old man fell ill. The medical expenses were increasing day by day. The eldest son denied to support him but he offered to return his 10% share if any one wants. Second son totally ignored the old man and became non communicado with ever one in the family. He kept the share of wealth with him. In fact he was planning how to take more share from the old man. Fourth son also became very arrogant with old man and did not extend any support for the medical support. The third son took great care of the old man and after some months the old man again got healthy life. The old man was thinking about the attitude of all the four sons.He was not very much upset with eldest one who at least offered to give his share back but the second and fourth hurt him too much. Despite 75% share to fourth son he took no care of the old man. The time passed and after some months the old man noticed that the fourth son had lost all the wealth and the second son was still not comfortable in life. Eldest son was living life of the same status as it was some years back but the third son had become very rich. Now he could afford anything and had no complain about the life. The old man had become very old and was living leisurely with third son. One day he asked the third son that despite no support from him how he could reach to a very high level. The son replied that you had not given him financial support but the blessings come automatically. These don't require the permission from the giver and automatically comes whether you like or not. To get the blessings one needs only good attitude. The son noticed that old man is not replying anything rather a small drop of tear on his cheek was coming down toward his chin. The old man got the answer which he never thought of."

Really friends we can steal the blessings even if some one not giving with our behaviour and attitude.

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The clock represents the time and continues to move irrespective to anything happening in this world. It irritates, it heals, it inspires and also it helps in memorising. We relate in almost everything with time. Till 15 hrs back we were waiting for Nikita and Parents to come and suddenly now you feel the house filled with love and affection. I know it is again temporary and after some days every one would be on own mission. This is life cycle and no one has control on this. The clock are designed round because the time would change constantly in the shape of cycle. It will move but come back again but in the process we would grow older moment by moment.

Presently reading a book "The Professional" by Mr. Subroto Bagchi. Mr. Bagchi has written three books so far in last about 5 years and all the books are good treasure for every middle class person. While reading the first book i.e. "The High Performance Entrepreneur" I felt as if this is written for me alone and I decided to build my own institution but there were some fears for its success and meanwhile as if Mr. Bagchi sensed my dilemma, he wrote another book named " Go Kiss the World". This book really gave the feeling and inspiration that any body can do any big thing provided he wish so. He was so humble in mentioning about his life and any one could relate to him. Here too the confidence built up to carry on the mission further but the tool was missing. Now he has come out with this third book which in simple way teaches what to do and what not to become a successful person. In my view one should read all these three books in chronological order.

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Friends

Satisfaction in the life is always a mental situation. We always dream to achieve the status of our idol whom we copy. The situation remains same and the only difference is that we replace that idol immediately once we feel that the existing parameters set by bus for getting satisfaction are now redundant. Every time we achieve something, we start comparing with some one who is beyond our achieved level. The dissatisfaction remains same irrespective to our commendable achievements. The moment we notice or come to know that some one of our age/level has achieved better than us, we start feeling dissatisfaction. We feel as if nothing has been achieved by us and again start reaching to the level of some other person. The tussle in the mind remains forever in one form or the other. It means the satisfaction is not in outside world, rather it is with in our self. It is Mrugtrishna which pressurises us to search the satisfaction in outside worlds whereas we have it already with in ourselves.

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Friends

Two disturbing thoughts were hitting my mind, so I thought let me share with you. These are :

1. Big city people always treat the smaller city people differently than the similar city person. I noticed many times this during the course of my professional assignments. Despite the fact that a person of small town may be highly knowledgeable, rich and reputed in the society than the person of big city, who may not even be well settled there. Even today some one coming from a village to a town would face different treatment, a town fellow going to city would face the same situation too. This goes on at every stage. City fellow going to metro and then overseas big cities and all. Typically in most of the cases the smaller area person ends up with low image and confidence as compared to the bigger one. He is taken for granted too many a times till the situation turns the table.

2. When we were young, whatever parents said we never mind that and followed their instructions irrespective of the consequence. We were refused to go to many parties, outings, movies etc. etc. and as soon as we started earning, got married our behaviour changed. We became more matured, intelligent, analytical and started taking their advices more in negative mode. Why this has happened that forget instructions even their suggestions were taken as threat to our ego. Would it not happen to us when we attain their age?What feeling they would be having on our responses? Would not they feel frustrate, irritate or helpless? The world is like a mirror, you get whatever you give and hence whatever response we are giving to our elders, we would be receiving same when we attain their age. So please beware.

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Friends

Exactly 20 years back, Shashi came into my life and we started journey of married life. Suddenly I felt socially promoted with complete change in life. Gradually came to know that this elevation has come with huge responsibilities towards my newly wedded partner, her family and my family. The period also coincided with tough struggle of life. Next five years were full of struggle socially and professionally. I moved out of Jaipur and it was Shashi who always stood behind me through out this phase. Never demanded anything, no luxury, no complain and always smiling. I salute her patience and fighting power in those days lot of responsibilities. Tremendous faith in my capabilities, belief in God and the sanskars of the parents made her strong enough to sail along with me through toughest time of our life.
The time has passed very fast and I don't feel like having married twenty years back, it seems not more than ten years old story. The life as family is really beautiful and challenging but nothing comes free in this world but in my opinion the price of getting married is almost nothing as against the benefits of happy married life.
I wish and pray to God that the life goes on like this and happily we complete next so many decades. It would not be possible without the blessings of parents and best wishes from every one.
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Friends

Every human being has different nature, character, aptitude, IQ, attitude, thought process, knowledge and mind set. All these factors play major role in shaping up of a person's destiny. Not only these in a family these affect complete family too. Trust, faith, dedication, sacrifice, love, affection, togetherness, sensitiveness and bonding are the result of the persons nature and attitude. A single person in a family can make the life miserable for every one. People fail to understand that the priorities of each and every one is also different and can not be same otherwise it would not have been family. I have experienced many times that kids have priority of either study or watching TV or playing games or chatting with friends whereas gents have work and sleeping on the top priority. These don't match with the priorities of home makers who are fully focused on getting house cleaning, bathing and completing breakfast. The priorities are understandable and every one in the family should try to consider the others' priorities and be flexible. However whenever we try to pressurise others to change the priority, clashes in disturbances starts in the life. Generally those with more powers in a family try to change the others' by force and that is where we spoil the family peace and happiness.

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